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Post by Baxter on Feb 19, 2005 16:28:57 GMT
In this era of over-reliance on CGI, action scenes and appealing to the lowest common denominator taking priority over good storyline, dialogue and characterization, movies are getting worse and worse. It appears that for every Closer or Sideways, there's ten Son of the Masks or Van Helsings. So, my question is quite simple. What in your opinion is the worst film ever made and why?
My nomination goes to - Freddy Got Fingered.
Given the choice I would post the entire review I have already written, but some of the language I have had to use to describe this putrid piece of garbage may be unacceptable for this forum. So here is a downsized version of my original analysis...
The plot, or whatever plot there is, is based around the antics of an aspiring animator by the name of Gordon Brody, played by Tom Green (some twerp off MTV, before you ask). After failing to make a name for himself in Hollywood, Gordon is forced to move back home with his parents and brother, Freddy. But Gordon’s aggressive father Jim, played by Rip Torn, does not take kindly to his son’s unconventional methods, resulting in a heated rivalry between the two. Green and Torn both over-act their parts ridiculously, to the point where it becomes pretty darn annoying. For all their shouting and “crazy” antics, Green and Torn leave the viewer with the impression that, beneath their loud exteriors, they are two very shallow individuals
The cheap-and-not-so-cheerful storyline merely serves as a justification for the sick (not to mention downright disturbing) “humour” displayed throughout. Examples of this include Green’s character sexually pleasuring farm animals, nearly killing a baby whilst a woman is in labour, licking open flesh wounds and beating his wheelchair-bound girlfriend with a stick. Get the picture yet? Even the biggest fans of “gross-out” comedies will probably find this unsettling in parts.
Quite simply, everything that is wrong with the film industry is on display here. The humour is crass and puerile, the characters are run-of-the-mill with no depth whatsoever, the acting is poor, and the storyline is virtually non-existent. The whole rotten thing is so bad, you can’t help but wonder if it was all just some sort of sick joke on Green’s part (he also wrote and directed the whole rotten mess).
"Honourable" mentions also to the following...
AI: Artificial Intelligence, Alien vs. Predator, Batman and Robin, Bulletproof Monk, Cats and Dogs, Catwoman, the Chronicles of Riddick, Daredevil, Dumb and Dumberer, Elektra, the Fast and the Furious, 2 Fast 2 Furious, the Haunted Mansion, House of the Dead, Racing Stripes, Ready to Rumble, Resident Evil: Apocalypse, Son of the Mask, Spice World, Spider-Man 2, Thunderbirds, Van Helsing, XXX, and many more!
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JJ
Script Hume
Bit of a hack, really.
Posts: 4,902
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Post by JJ on Feb 19, 2005 17:10:55 GMT
What on Mobius is Spider-man 2, Resident Evil Apocalypse, and Aliens versus Predator doing on a list of WORST films? They are three of my current faves. Daredevil and AI aren't bad either. Oh, and my nominations go to Garfield, Men in Black II, and Alien Resurrection.
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Post by Omnion (yes, he is a man) on Feb 19, 2005 19:21:34 GMT
Van helsing, truly the worst film I've ever seen. Scary movie 3, the only thing funny about it is how mediocre it is. Star Wars, to a lesser extent the first 3. Matrix Revolutions, it ruined everything. Thunderbirds. Hahahahahahhahahahhahahahahasucks. Thunderpants. Snort.
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Post by RSM on Feb 19, 2005 20:09:40 GMT
Thunderpants - OMFGWTF?? AI - Was just a bit blah, never felt complete to me Spice World- OMFGWTF?? Thunderbirds - Involved busted, nuff said Behind Enemy Lines - American gung ho drivel Collataral Damage - See behind enemy lines All Rambo movies except the one in Vietnam - See behind enemy lines Robocop 3: What was the point? Nominates: Thunderbirds
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Post by Omnion (yes, he is a man) on Feb 19, 2005 20:16:52 GMT
Van helsing is king of suckage. My nomination, as you are all no doubt aware...
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Ed
Ex-Hume
Satan (Apparently)
Posts: 4,320
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Post by Ed on Feb 19, 2005 20:26:32 GMT
Geez guys, there must be worse films than these. I'm no fan of "Spider-Man 2" but despite its trite plot and insipid direction, it's a long way from the worst film ever. A few stand out for me, varying from "so bad it's kind of hilarious" to "so irredeemably bad you'll want to crawl away and cry." PIRAHNA 2: THE SPAWNING I suspect this is one film that James Cameron tends to omit from his CV. What makes this catastrophic cheesefest kind of endearing is the sight of pirahnas zooming around the screen like the deadly bunny rabbit in "Monty Python". There's a certain comedy about being bad... and when a film is this moronic, it can be a great experience. But only if you're drunk enough that you won't really remember anything about it the following morning. THE HITCHER II: I'VE BEEN WAITING I honestly can't imagine what possessed them. The original "Hitcher" is a deeply flawed but nonetheless quite entertaining action thriller about a murderous hitch-hiker who trails a kid, killing everyone around him, and somehow (through totally insane logic) gets the kid implicated in the killings. Its beauty lies almost entirely in the awesome performance of Rutger Hauer as the eponymous hitcher. So producing a sequel without Hauer, and where the original kid (now in his 40s) gets killed off by the new-Hitcher early on doesn't bode well. Instead, the most wooden actress ever is chased by the moustache-twirlingly hammy actor who plays the new Hitcher and through some bizarre logic we're supposed to understand that it's the same person. The film shudders along from hammy catastrophe (WoodenGirl is trapped in a falling-down water tower!) to B-grade disaster thrills. There's really no excuse for films like this, even direct to video. DREAMCATCHER I have mixed views of Stephen King films. I don't particularly like the narratives and certainly have no desire from the films to read any of his books. Still, I have occasionally enjoyed some of the King-inspired films, such as "The Shining" and "The Green Mile". But this monstrosity is beyond the pale. It didn't help that I paid good money to see it in a poorly ventilated cinema which stank of sweat, but the film was epic in its failures. The plot veered from nonsense to nonsense, with thinly veiled characters and horror scenes ripped straight from other, better, films. The climax was deeply uninteresting, and the film was the ultimate chore to watch. If I was on my own, I'd have walked out. This film had a big budget, a chronically underused Morgan Freeman and the great TV character actor Michael O'Neill. But really, it shouldn't have been made. There are probably other films that will occur to me in due course, but I'm pretty fussy about films. I like classic movies and you don't tend to get too many stinkers that are more than 10 years old being replayed on TV or brought out on DVD. Or at least, I've been lucky enough not to discover them yet.
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Post by Dave on Feb 19, 2005 20:41:52 GMT
Hero. It's s**t.
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Spudiator
Artist Hume
High Priest of the Religion of Football
STC-O's resident footy obsessive
Posts: 2,815
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Post by Spudiator on Feb 19, 2005 21:14:48 GMT
I actually liked Freddy Got Fingered, I love toilet humour and I was in stitched watching it. I like Spiderman 2 as well. There are a million films that could so easily fit in this catergory, like Dumb and Dumberer, Police Academy 5, 6 & 7, etc. But the be honest there are two films I can think of that are worse than any others I've ever seen!
Michael J. Fox did a movie years ago called The Concierge, which was by far the single most boring, dull and pointless film ever produced
Alongside that is a film called A Father's Betrayal that just happened to be on telly one night when I was too bored to reach over for the TV remote. Brian Dennehy is some bloke who had rapes his young co-worker, and spent the whole movie denying it, thinking she'd wanted it at the time, only for him to get an attack of concience at the end and declare himself guilty. The acting was diabolical, and about as convincing and believable as Tony Blair trying to be sincere. I've never seen it again on telly since then thankfully.
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Post by Sin on Feb 19, 2005 22:51:56 GMT
Well, this probably isn't the worst film ever made, but the worse film I've seen and can remember is Open Water. I can't write a long rant becasue if I do I'll end up spoiling the movie (which will probably be a good think since it will stop other people from watching it), but I can easily say that I was bored by it beyond belief. About 2/3s of the way though it I started reading a free film mag I had picked up.
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Post by Shadic? on Feb 20, 2005 0:17:39 GMT
OMG!? HOW COULD YOU SAY SPIDER-MAN 2.. That's like a sin against humanity...
Worst movie you say?
Cross Roads.
Starring Britney Spears.
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Post by JC on Feb 20, 2005 2:53:29 GMT
EDIT: Sorry dan I didnt read your post I just saw the title of this thread and decided to vent at this film. But I think that this film now speaks for itself on how bad it is!
Lets see bad films, bad films I've not seen the ultimate bad film that i'll list as number one but During a class at my old college someone brought out their phone and said listen to this after he put it on speaker. he then rang up to book tickets and this happened.
Freddy got Fingered
UGC: Good afternoon UGC Cinnema.
James: Hello I was wondering are you showing the film Freddy got fingered?
UGC: (strange pause. some rustling, a laugh)
James: Hello?
UGC: (new voice) hello UGC how may I help you?
James: Hello I was wondering if I could book tickets for Freddy got fingered?
UGC: Can you say that again please?
James: Yes I'd like to book tickets for fready got fingered.
UGC: Yes sir... are you a student? (a laugh is heard in the background)
James: Yes, do you need my nus number?
UGC: No thats ok... Look you wont need to book for this film.
James: Why's that dont you do bookings anymore?
UGC: (a huge burst of laughter came over the phone line).
James: Hello?
UGC: You wont need to book for this drat kid! we havent sold a single seat for days now! (roars of laughter are heard)
Soul Survivors
Everything about this film is dreadful. the acting, the cinnematography, the music choice, everything. The plot especially, so much so a guy stood up at the end and shouted this "WHAT THE F*(K WAS THE C*@P, THE F*(K SHES DEAD! SHE DIED TWICE! WHY DID THE VICAR RAPE HER! THE F*(K! I WANT MY F*(KIN MONEY BACK!"
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Post by Hevs on Feb 20, 2005 11:22:29 GMT
The Fly and the woman in black.
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Post by madhair60 on Feb 20, 2005 12:48:52 GMT
I'd like to stick my neck out and say that you've never seen at least two thirds of that list. In fact I find it pretty irritating how much of a sheep you're being.
Scary Movie 2 tops my list. ONE smile.
Van Helsing did its job ably, and A.I is excellent.
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Post by t3hchaosx3 on Feb 20, 2005 13:00:05 GMT
Daredevil, 2 Fast 2 Furious and Open Water.
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Post by Omnion (yes, he is a man) on Feb 20, 2005 13:24:04 GMT
Hero. It's [don't abuse the swearing filter. It's there for a reason.]. What are you on, man? Hero's hardly great, but it's not the worst film ever, for God's sake. Suggest something TRULY crap! muttermuttervanhelsingmuttermutter
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Post by Ben2k9 on Feb 20, 2005 13:25:13 GMT
Jeepers Creepers. Its complete rubbish! Its so predictable I almost walked out watching it. and whoever said the original Star Wars's are bad needs to be shot!
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Post by Omnion (yes, he is a man) on Feb 20, 2005 13:29:46 GMT
* holds up his hand and stops the bullets*
"He's the one...!"
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Post by Baxter on Feb 20, 2005 15:01:55 GMT
Ed - Bear in mind that there are probably a lot of worse films out there that I have yet to see. That said, I can't ever see anything topping Freddy Got Fingered for sheer awfulness.
Shadic - Sorry, but I found Spider-Man 2 to be a load of overbearing, prentious garbage. Just my opinion.
Madhair - How exactly am I being a "sheep"? I have the right to my own opinion. Van Helsing was _IN MY OPINION_ awful, as was A.I (heck, even Spielberg admits it sucked).
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Post by Retro on Feb 20, 2005 15:15:01 GMT
Sex Lives of the Potato Men.
It felt like you were having mould covered apple cores rammed down your throat for 2 hours.
The single worst media presentation (yes that includes, drama, TV, cut scenes and films) I have ever had the misfortune to see.
Spiderman I thought was alright, though in my opinion its a bit over-rated simply because it has one of the best hero's of all time in it. Worth seeing, but nothing ground breaking.
*rips eyes out at memory of Sex Lives of the Potato Men*
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Post by Baxter on Feb 20, 2005 15:16:50 GMT
Haven't seen Sex Lives, but have heard it is truly awful. One to miss methinks.
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Post by Omnion (yes, he is a man) on Feb 20, 2005 18:26:23 GMT
Sex lives is literally meant to be the worst British film of all time. Dunno if it's true or not, but that's what 3/4 reviews I've read say.
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Post by Zerolus on Feb 20, 2005 22:54:13 GMT
8 Mile. I hated that film.
"Yo! Let's rap all day!"
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Post by Blizz on Feb 20, 2005 23:14:22 GMT
For me it'd either be Garfield or Super Mario Bros.
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Post by Baxter on Feb 22, 2005 15:58:42 GMT
I actually quite liked Super Mario Bros. *shot*
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Post by Samface on Feb 22, 2005 16:07:26 GMT
Just to totally debunk ones voted for by other people ( ) Hero: Excellent. Van Helsing: Brainless fun. A.I.: Very good. Would've been excellent, if it weren't for that daft last twenty minutes. Resident Evil Apocalypse: Brilliantly stupid. Bulletproof Monk: Ditto. (Although MUCH MUCH stupider than REA.) Alien Resurrection: Better than Alien 3. WHICH WAS ALSO GOOD, SMARTYPANTSES. My nomination for Worst Film Ever is League of Extraordinary Gentlemen. The sets were fantastic, but all the money was clearly wasted on that. The effects were laughable, the script was risible, and everyone acted on auto-pilot. It's not even funny-bad, like Bulletproof Monk.
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